Branded Coconuts at SantaCon, Where Even Santa Had One

On December 16, 2023, a whole lot of grown adults put on Santa suits and went to the beach. That's SantaCon in San Diego. We were there with branded coconuts, which is a sentence I could not have explained to anybody back in New York.

I used to work in venture capital there. December in New York does not have palm trees. It also does not have this many Santas. I've adjusted.

what was on the shell

This was Almost Nakey's SantaCon, at the Beach House at Belmont Park, 3125 Ocean Front Walk. The stamp had "Almost Nakey" on a little ribbon banner up top, a big chunky SANTACON in the middle, and "BELMONT PARK, SD" at the bottom, in case any Santa forgot where he was. Some coconuts got our own palm-tree badge instead.

People ask us for engraved coconuts all the time. It's a hot stamp. But sure, Santa. Call it whatever you want.

Then the garnish. A sprig of rosemary sticking out the top and a red-and-white striped straw. So every coconut had a tiny Christmas tree and a candy cane coming out of its head.

Think about that. Pretty much everybody on that boardwalk showed up dressed as the same guy. The coconut came as a Christmas tree. Best costume there, and it wasn't even trying.

Our staff opens each one right in front of you. At SantaCon, "you" was always Santa. A different Santa every time. I think. Hard to say.

sunset, roughly

We got going around 5, right before sunset. Red and green stockings hung along the string lights over the boardwalk. Everybody had wristbands. The seagulls did not, and nobody said a word to them.

There was a thatched tiki hut with a sign that said "The North Pole." I did not question it.

The crowd was what you'd expect. Women in Santa dresses holding coconuts up. Guys in full Santa suits. Guys who only committed as far as the sweater. One guy held an inflatable can over his head, a bit I respect and still do not understand.

The MVP was a guy with a big mustache in a red tee. Coconut balanced on his head, beer can in his other hand, like a waiter at a restaurant that doesn't exist.

In front of the DJ stage it was Santa hats as far as you could see, with arms poking out of the hats holding stamped coconuts up like trophies.

ok then it turned into a rave

By 8 it was full dark and the whole thing had become a rave. Disco ball on the DJ booth. The Belmont Park roller coaster lit up behind it, and a woman holding a coconut over her head in front of it like she'd won it at the ring toss. The Plunge was glowing green over there for reasons nobody explained to me.

Guys in hockey jerseys and Santa hats drinking out of coconuts. Somebody in a fuzzy green Grinch-ish situation. An ugly sweater with penguins on it that said "Waddle Service," which is better copy than anything I have ever written for this company.

At one point a guy went by carrying a woman in red flared pants. Then a giant inflatable candy cane. I have no explanation for the candy cane. Ours was smaller. It's not a competition.

Somebody had set up a Christmas tree on Persian rugs, with wrapped presents and floor cushions. A full living room, on a boardwalk, in Mission Beach. Looked great, honestly.

and then Santa showed up

The real one. Or the realest one there. White beard, wig, little round glasses, red suit, gift bag. Full kit.

He was drinking a coconut. The striped straw went into the beard and just vanished. I never located the mouth. It's in there somewhere. I have to assume.

Let's be careful here. Santa, a man with a long and well-documented cookie arrangement, was drinking out of a coconut at SantaCon. Does that mean Santa endorses Windandsea Coconuts? Legally, I can't say that. I'm just telling you where the straw went.

the boardwalk thing

This whole business started in 2021 with a breakfast sandwich cart on the Pacific Beach boardwalk. Bacon, egg, and cheese at sunrise.

Two years later I'm on a different boardwalk after sunset, watching Santa drink through his beard. I'm calling that a promotion.

If you've got your own weird thing coming up, here's how we do brand activations.

Anyway. Everybody came as Santa, the coconut came as a Christmas tree, and somehow the coconut won. Next year I'm going as the coconut.